Friday, December 21, 2012

Because You Miss Baseball

It's the MLB offseason and YOU miss baseball!
The Dodgers shocked (but didn't shock) you by signing Zack Greinke, you followed the RA Dickey saga until he got deported and you have stayed up nights hoping Michael Bourn will roam the (insert your team's stadium here) outfield in 2013 and beyond.

If you are a Pirates fan, you grimace at the thought of Joel Hanrahan being shipped off for questionable return. If you are a Phillies fan, you (for some reason) see Michael Young as a top of the order savior. If you are an Angels fan, God bless you and God bless Mike Trout.

Jon Heyman, Ken Rosenthal, Jon Morosi, Danny Knobler and the rest of the breaking news guys feed your need to have every single rumor spewed on your timeline. Whether it is a potential signing, trade or roster move, these writers want to report everything that tickles their ears; AND YOU LOVE IT! At this point, you know SOURCE better than you know yourself.

You hear rumors that don't come to fruition. You hear reports from 100 different people once a transaction is completed. You hear things that ruin the element of surprise. But you don't unfollow these guys because you miss the game too much. It's mid December and there are still five major holidays between you and Spring Training.

The game you love isn't happening every night. Your (insert your beloved NHL team's name here) is locked out, you can't find yourself to watch the NBA under any circumstance and there are just too many days between Sundays. You long for more fulfilling times, when turning on the TV at 7:05 meant something other than missing the first five minutes of a Seinfeld rerun.

Once March comes around, you'll welcome the annual return of America's Pastime. But until then, you NEED the scoop on every single roster move, because you sure as hell aren't getting scoops from your local ice cream place (run by jerks) that closed in October.

You hear things and get worked up, but you can't live and die on every single rumor. Thoughts like "Is (insert your team's General Manager here) gonna sign any free agents?" and "Will (insert your team's beloved player here) gonna get traded today?" get you on pins and needles all day and night.

You should absolutely appreciate the offseason news, because it's a way to stay connected to your team during the four dark months. But, in all seriousness, cool your jets. Unless your NFL team is the Jets. Which sucks. In that case, you probably like the Mets. Which also sucks. Quite honestly, your time might better be served ringing the bell for the Salvation Army or something. Get to that.

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